For new readers of this blog, you may have missed this series of articles I wrote in 2012 about adoption and lies.
Here are the links:
Sep 22, 2012
PART FIVE: Victims of Adoption and Lies. Part 5 FORGIVENESS. By Trace A. DeMeyer. I woke up with two thoughts: there are two victims of adoption who need help and not necessarily from each other: the adoptee and the ...
Aug 25, 2012
My friend's mother was a victim of lies and so was her Ojibwe father - who was never told. My point here is the adoption industry created "lies" for everyone to believe. PART TWO will continue in a week... Please share your ...
Sep 01, 2012
Part 2: By Trace A. DeMeyer. I woke up with thoughts: there are two victims of adoption who need help and not necessarily from each other: the adoptee and the first mother. Each has its own burden and neither can heal the ...
Sep 08, 2012
Part 3: Victims of Adoption and Lies. Part 3. By Trace A. DeMeyer. I woke up with two thoughts: there are two victims of adoption who need help and not necessarily from each other: the adoptee and the first mother. Each has its own burden and neither can heal the other. CONTROL THE MESSAGE Since I started this Victims series, ... Posted by Trace L Hentz at 5:55 AM. Labels: #Adoption, #NDN, 60s scoop, Adoptee reunions, billion dollar adoption industry, Control ...
Part Four was deleted - you didn't miss it. The adoptee was not who she said she was... I will be sharing more in November! ...Trace
My Son may be native. His bio-grandfather was supposedly adopted into a well off white family from and Iroquois Nation tribe (probably a PA or NY one) when he was 7. He did not fit into the new family and just wanted to go home, for punishments' he was often told how he should be grateful for the family saving him from the savages and force fed a diet of strict conservative Christian values. Apparently he ran away as soon as he could but the family refused to give him access to any records. The are still refusing to this day. He got involved with the Hells Angels in the 1970's and met my ex-husband's mom. She was a younger runaway and he took her on as his woman for a summer, ditching her as soon as he found out she was pregnant and had been lying about her age (only 14 at the time). she went back to family and raised her boy, my ex, with her family traditions as half greek/polish. My ex was never connected with them. As she was a young single mother they were both treated badly and as he was not fully white, he was made to feel wrong and apart. They did not keep in contact with my ex's father much. Eventually he had gotten into big trouble and was sent to prison for life in FL. I have had to split from my ex because he became addicted to any and everything that would make him numb and his brain became so affected that even when he was sober, he was no longer the same person. He felt very strongly that he owned me and came back to get me once. Although I managed to not go with him, he left behind a surprise for me, our son. My ex is now also in jail. He signed away custody as soon as the Judge made it clear that she was going to take it away anyhow. My son is now 7. I've tried hard to raise him with no real religion so that he is free to choose his own path. I try to connect his with the culture of my people. However, out of all the many cultures and traditions I've exposed him to, there is only one he feels connected with. We currently live in AZ and I have taken him to a bunch of local Native events. He is always wide eyed and moved with these little things that I find very surprising. For him they just click in ways other ideas/rituals don't. I have no way to access any records from my Ex's father that I know of, and as a single mom just can't afford genetic testing right now. We live in an area where we are far from the people of his "genetic past." I'm looking for any help or suggestions on what I, his ashamed at how white and ignorant I am, can do to help him find what is right for him. Thanks in advance for any helps.
ReplyDeleteThe blood is loud. Make sure your son is aware of this history (when he is older) and he will find the money to find his tribe... eventually.
ReplyDelete