by Jo Swanson, October 25, 2010
I was looking for a quote in my 1989 'mini-book' The Adoption Machine and came across something I had forgotten about. It fortifies what we've known all along about why agencies fight so hard to keep adoptees and birth families from locating one another. The agency is in Michigan - it's the one my daughter was placed through. I'll quote directly from the book:
A birthmother who placed her child through our same "Christian" agency contacted me for search help. She had kept in touch with her social worker throughout the years, even after the woman retired, as a way of somehow staying connected to her child. In recent visits, the former social worker had become quite upset about the birthmother's desire to be reunited with her daughter. "Give it up," she admonished her, suggesting that she was merely having a "bad day." "Cheer up! You have another family now! Besides, I checked the phone book recently, and the family isn't living in the area anymore."
Mother and daughter did meet, however, and upon comparing information provided to each by the agency at time of placement and later with the real story, found:
Claim: Birthmother was told by her social worker at time of relinquishment that her infant was perfectly normal and healthy.
Fact: Records indicated the child was diagnosed in the hospital, right after birth, as having a severe hearing impairment (95% loss), possibly due to exposure of mother, unknowingly, to German measles during pregnancy.
Claim: One year after relinquishment, birthmother was sent a letter by the agency, informing her that her child was "in a happy home" and that the adoption was finalized.
Fact: At the time the social worker wrote that letter, this child was back in foster care after a failed adoption. "The adoptive mother was having a nervous breakdown and couldn't handle a handicapped child." A second placement had been made at thirteen months, and fortunately it was a very good placement.
Claim: The adoptive family no longer lived in the area.
Fact: Adoptive father was deceased, but the mother still lived in the same home as at the time of adoption, and was still listed in phone directory. (Adoptive mother was supportive of her daughter's desire to meet her birth family.)
Claim: The adoptive couple had been told by the agency social worker after placement that the child's birthmother had died subsequent to the birth! (Common practice, we now know, as was telling birthmothers their infants died before or after birth.)
Fact: This agency social worker had spun so many lies that she was in a virtual panic that the two parties might actually meet one day and learn the truth!
We're getting the truth out drop by drop. But we've been doing it for so many decades - when will legislators begin to "get it" and realize how power has been abused by adoption brokers at the expense of children and their mothers?
[Lies...This is one example of the difficulties in dealing with the adoption industry, social workers and lawmakers on passing unconditional "no consent clause" access to our OBC (original birth certificate) and our adoption records... Trace]
Pages
- Home
- About Trace
- Question and Answer with Trace
- Karen Vigneault - Helping Native Adoptees Search
- Soaring Angels (search help for adoptees)
- You're Breaking Up: Adoptive Couple v. Baby Girl #ICWA
- About the Indian Adoption Projects
- NEW: Study by Jeannine Carriere (First Nations) (2...
- Bibliography
- Split Feathers Study
- Oklahoma Supreme Court RULING: Brown v.Delapp (9-2...
- NEW STUDY: Post Adoption (Australia)
- Adoption History
- Laura Briggs: Feminists and the Baby Veronica Case...
- Help for First Nations Adoptees (Canada)
- GOLDWATER
- Canada Timeline
- THE PLACEMENT OF AMERICAN INDIAN CHILDREN - THE NEED FOR CHANGE (1974)
- How to Open Closed Adoption Records for Native American Children
BACK UP BLOG
This blog is a backup for American Indian Adoptees blog
There might be some duplicate posts prior to 2020. I am trying to delete them when I find them. Sorry!
There might be some duplicate posts prior to 2020. I am trying to delete them when I find them. Sorry!
If you need support
Support Info: If you are a Survivor and need emotional support, a national crisis line is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week: Residential School Survivor Support Line: 1-866-925-4419. Additional Health Support Information: Emotional, cultural, and professional support services are also available to Survivors and their families through the Indian Residential Schools Resolution Health Support Program. Services can be accessed on an individual, family, or group basis.” These & regional support phone numbers are found at https://nctr.ca/contact/survivors/ .
MY EMAIL: tracelara@pm.me
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
CLICK OLDER POSTS (above) to see more news
BOOKSHOP
Please use BOOKSHOP to buy our titles. We will not be posting links to Amazon.
Featured Post
Racism is EMBEDDED in American archaeology: Q and A with Cree-Métis archaeologist Paulette Steeves
CBC Docs · February 9, 2023 Archaeologist Paulette Steeves is working to rewrite global human history for Indigenous people | Walking ...
Popular Posts
-
White Earth Nation welcomes adoptees home by Dan Gunderson , Minnesota Public Radio October 5, 2007 Listen to feature audio This weekend th...
-
2023 Editor NOTE: This is one of our most popular posts so we are reblogging it. (SEE COMMENTS) If you do know where Michael Schwartz is, pl...
-
I could on for an hour about this but I won't. Fathers have rights and this time, a father got his daughter back after a...
-
You know everything happens for a reason. I just received the book “Sudden Fury” about an adoptee who killed his adoptive parents in Marylan...
-
Boston Globe June 2, 1996 REUNION DAY AT 43: NAVAJO NATIVE FINALLY HOME Author: Royal Ford, G...
-
CLICK: AMERICAN INDIAN ADOPTEES: GUEST POST: Reactive Attachment Disorder by Levi E... : Levi EagleFeather (Lakota) This is one of the most...
-
T he Métis National Council and the Government of Canada will be working collaboratively, Nation-to-Nation, to develop a process to engag...
To Veronica Brown
Veronica, we adult adoptees are thinking of you today and every day. We will be here when you need us. Your journey in the adopted life has begun, nothing can revoke that now, the damage cannot be undone. Be courageous, you have what no adoptee before you has had; a strong group of adult adoptees who know your story, who are behind you and will always be so.
Wonderful post. thank you!
ReplyDeleteThis actually looks like a mild version of the lies that go on. These people will go to any lengths to get their hands on a money making baby and all these fake birth certificates and laws against getting OBCs...the BS about mothers wanting no contact/confidentiality...All that and then some is simply to keep the lies a secret so that more money can be made at the expense of loving mothers and their children's lives. I will always be enraged by this.
The more we put the truth out there...the more mothers and children reunite and speak the truth the faster we'll FINALLY make change happen.
Wonderful post. thank you!
ReplyDeleteThis actually looks like a mild version of the lies that go on. These people will go to any lengths to get their hands on a money making baby and all these fake birth certificates and laws against getting OBCs...the BS about mothers wanting no contact/confidentiality...All that and then some is simply to keep the lies a secret so that more money can be made at the expense of loving mothers and their children's lives. I will always be enraged by this.
The more we put the truth out there...the more mothers and children reunite and speak the truth the faster we'll FINALLY make change happen.