BACK UP BLOG

This blog is a backup for American Indian Adoptees blog
There might be some duplicate posts prior to 2020. I am trying to delete them when I find them. Sorry!

SURVEY FOR ALL FIRST NATIONS ADOPTEES

SURVEY FOR ALL FIRST NATIONS ADOPTEES
ADOPTEES - we are doing a COUNT

If you need support

Support Info: If you are a Survivor and need emotional support, a national crisis line is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week: Residential School Survivor Support Line: 1-866-925-4419. Additional Health Support Information: Emotional, cultural, and professional support services are also available to Survivors and their families through the Indian Residential Schools Resolution Health Support Program. Services can be accessed on an individual, family, or group basis.” These & regional support phone numbers are found at https://nctr.ca/contact/survivors/ . MY EMAIL: tracelara@pm.me

Friday, August 20, 2010

Strong as a Willow

My youth disappeared

under spell and dominion,

too powerless, mute, and

too weak to protest



Maid, cook, whore, child

Necessary, I believed, so

I disappeared into their idea

of what I should be



I read their desires as directions

like their force, somehow

My illusion had to be protected

with all my energy and faith



I trusted I would be safe

I told myself it was love

and that it was worth it

I was wrong, I was as good as dead



I was incapable of love

to any degree

There was no emotion

Just a numb, frozen heart



I found memories of a little princess

whose father took his piece

then a procession of narcissists

who either betrayed or enslaved



Yet even a slave is rewarded

Angels arrive, teachers, books

that open my world of silence

and give me my voice



There is no worthless left

just a force and direction

There are beliefs that allow no weakness

and no men left to dominate desire



Now, as I choose,

I am safe within my own walls,

alive in my body, strong as a willow,

as wild, as free.





© 2010 Trace A. DeMeyer

Strong as a Willow

My youth disappeared
under spell and dominion,
too powerless, mute, and
too weak to protest

Maid, cook, whore, child
Necessary, I believed, so
I disappeared into their idea
of what I should be

I read their desires as directions
like their force, somehow
My illusion had to be protected
with all my energy and faith

I trusted I would be safe
I told myself it was love
and that it was worth it
I was wrong, I was as good as dead

I was incapable of love
to any degree
There was no emotion
Just a numb, frozen heart

I found memories of a little princess
whose father took his piece
then a procession of narcissists
who either betrayed or enslaved

Yet even a slave is rewarded
Angels arrive, teachers, books
that open my world of silence
and give me my voice

There is no worthless left
just a force and direction
There are beliefs that allow no weakness
and no men left to dominate desire

Now, as I choose,
I am safe within my own walls,
alive in my body, strong as a willow,
as wild, as free.


© 2010 Trace A. DeMeyer

Strong as a Willow

My youth disappeared
under spell and dominion,
too powerless, mute, and
too weak to protest

Maid, cook, whore, child
Necessary, I believed, so
I disappeared into their idea
of what I should be

I read their desires as directions
like their force, somehow
My illusion had to be protected
with all my energy and faith

I trusted I would be safe
I told myself it was love
and that it was worth it
I was wrong, I was as good as dead

I was incapable of love
to any degree
There was no emotion
Just a numb, frozen heart

I found memories of a little princess
whose father took his piece
then a procession of narcissists
who either betrayed or enslaved

Yet even a slave is rewarded
Angels arrive, teachers, books
that open my world of silence
and give me my voice

There is no worthless left
just a force and direction
There are beliefs that allow no weakness
and no men left to dominate desire

Now, as I choose,
I am safe within my own walls,
alive in my body, strong as a willow,
as wild, as free.
© 2010 Trace A. DeMeyer

Strong as a Willow

My youth disappeared
under spell and dominion,
too powerless, mute, and
too weak to protest

Maid, cook, whore, child
Necessary, I believed, so
I disappeared into their idea
of what I should be

I read their desires as directions
like their force, somehow
My illusion had to be protected
with all my energy and faith

I trusted I would be safe
I told myself it was love
and that it was worth it
I was wrong, I was as good as dead

I was incapable of love
to any degree
There was no emotion
Just a numb, frozen heart

I found memories of a little princess
whose father took his piece
then a procession of narcissists
who either betrayed or enslaved

Yet even a slave is rewarded
Angels arrive, teachers, books
that open my world of silence
and give me my voice

There is no worthless left
just a force and direction
There are beliefs that allow no weakness
and no men left to dominate desire

Now, as I choose,
I am safe within my own walls,
alive in my body, strong as a willow,
as wild, as free.
© 2010 Trace A. DeMeyer

Strong as a Willow

My youth disappeared
under spell and dominion,
too powerless, mute, and
too weak to protest

Maid, cook, whore, child
Necessary, I believed, so
I disappeared into their idea
of what I should be

I read their desires as directions
like their force, somehow
My illusion had to be protected
with all my energy and faith

I trusted I would be safe
I told myself it was love
and that it was worth it
I was wrong, I was as good as dead

I was incapable of love
to any degree
There was no emotion
Just a numb, frozen heart

I found memories of a little princess
whose father took his piece
then a procession of narcissists
who either betrayed or enslaved

Yet even a slave is rewarded
Angels arrive, teachers, books
that open my world of silence
and give me my voice

There is no worthless left
just a force and direction
There are beliefs that allow no weakness
and no men left to dominate desire

Now, as I choose,
I am safe within my own walls,
alive in my body, strong as a willow,
as wild, as free.
© 2010 Trace A. DeMeyer

Strong as a Willow

My youth disappeared
under spell and dominion,
too powerless, mute, and
too weak to protest

Maid, cook, whore, child
Necessary, I believed, so
I disappeared into their idea
of what I should be

I read their desires as directions
like their force, somehow
My illusion had to be protected
with all my energy and faith

I trusted I would be safe
I told myself it was love
and that it was worth it
I was wrong, I was as good as dead

I was incapable of love
to any degree
There was no emotion
Just a numb, frozen heart

I found memories of a little princess
whose father took his piece
then a procession of narcissists
who either betrayed or enslaved

Yet even a slave is rewarded
Angels arrive, teachers, books
that open my world of silence
and give me my voice

There is no worthless left
just a force and direction
There are beliefs that allow no weakness
and no men left to dominate desire

Now, as I choose,
I am safe within my own walls,
alive in my body, strong as a willow,
as wild, as free.
© 2010 Trace A. DeMeyer

Strong as a Willow

My youth disappeared
under spell and dominion,
too powerless, mute, and
too weak to protest

Maid, cook, whore, child
Necessary, I believed, so
I disappeared into their idea
of what I should be

I read their desires as directions
like their force, somehow
My illusion had to be protected
with all my energy and faith

I trusted I would be safe
I told myself it was love
and that it was worth it
I was wrong, I was as good as dead

I was incapable of love
to any degree
There was no emotion
Just a numb, frozen heart

I found memories of a little princess
whose father took his piece
then a procession of narcissists
who either betrayed or enslaved

Yet even a slave is rewarded
Angels arrive, teachers, books
that open my world of silence
and give me my voice

There is no worthless left
just a force and direction
There are beliefs that allow no weakness
and no men left to dominate desire

Now, as I choose,
I am safe within my own walls,
alive in my body, strong as a willow,
as wild, as free.
© 2010 Trace A. DeMeyer

Friday, August 13, 2010

Adopt a village

By Trace Hentz  (8-13-2010)



I am a Laura Jean Thrall-Bland and I was Tracy Ann DeMeyer. 



Split feather – two names – two identities. Confusing, right?

Are any adoptees reading this? How about foster children? How about adoptive parents? Now what I can’t ask is – have any of you given a baby up for adoption? Why can’t I ask? Because there is a shame associated with this for many mothers and there is a stigma attached.

Thank God, little by little this stigma is changing, and views about adoptees who search for their relatives and open their adoptions is changing. Natural moms who want to find their lost child is changing.

What I learned about adoption and statistics in the past several years changed me.

What I discovered in reunion was not as pleasant as I wished, yet an increased awareness helped me write the book, heal my wounds, and transform fear into love.

The more I learned the better I healed.

As for the children who need families, please do not be afraid to become foster parents and legal guardians. Do not rob a child of their identity. Go to Social Services. 




I think rich celebrities need to adopt a village, not an individual child. If Madonna can afford it, she should sponsor an entire village in Africa and pay for their food and education, so she can end the cycle of poverty.

We can’t fix adoption until we fix poverty, and we know that won’t be easy. Like Gandhi said, poverty is the worse form of violence. Poor families, Indian people on reservations with stifling poverty, their children, and future generations, are my greatest concern right now.

I promise you, once you read my memoir, you’ll never look at adoption in the same way again.

Adopt a village

By Trace Hentz  (8-13-2010)

I am a Laura Jean Thrall-Bland and I was Tracy Ann DeMeyer. 

Split feather – two names – two identities. Confusing, right?
Are any adoptees reading this? How about foster children? How about adoptive parents? Now what I can’t ask is – have any of you given a baby up for adoption? Why can’t I ask? Because there is a shame associated with this for many mothers and there is a stigma attached.
Thank God, little by little this stigma is changing, and views about adoptees who search for their relatives and open their adoptions is changing. Natural moms who want to find their lost child is changing.
What I learned about adoption and statistics in the past several years changed me.
What I discovered in reunion was not as pleasant as I wished, yet an increased awareness helped me write the book, heal my wounds, and transform fear into love.
The more I learned the better I healed.
As for the children who need families, please do not be afraid to become foster parents and legal guardians. Do not rob a child of their identity. Go to Social Services. 

I think rich celebrities need to adopt a village, not an individual child. If Madonna can afford it, she should sponsor an entire village in Africa and pay for their food and education, so she can end the cycle of poverty.
We can’t fix adoption until we fix poverty, and we know that won’t be easy. Like Gandhi said, poverty is the worse form of violence. Poor families, Indian people on reservations with stifling poverty, their children, and future generations, are my greatest concern right now.
I promise you, once you read my memoir, you’ll never look at adoption in the same way again.

Adopt a village

I am a Laura Jean Thrall-Bland and I am Trace DeMeyer. Split feather – two names – two identities. Confusing, right?
Are any adoptees reading this? How about foster children? How about adoptive parents? Now what I can’t ask is – have any of you given a baby up for adoption? Why can’t I ask? Because there is a shame associated with this for many mothers and there is a stigma attached.
Thank God, little by little this stigma is changing, and views about adoptees who search for their relatives and open their adoptions is changing. Natural moms who want to find their lost child is changing.
What I learned about adoption and statistics in the past several years changed me.
What I discovered in reunion was not as pleasant as I wished, yet an increased awareness helped me write the book, heal my wounds, and transform fear into love.
The more I learned the better I healed.
As for the children who need families, please do not be afraid to become foster parents and legal guardians. Do not rob a child of their identity. Go to Social Services. I think rich celebrities need to adopt a village, not an individual child. If Madonna can afford it, she should sponsor an entire village in Africa and pay for their food and education, so she can end the cycle of poverty.
We can’t fix adoption until we fix poverty, and we know that won’t be easy. Like Gandhi said, poverty is the worse form of violence. Poor families, Indian people on reservations with stifling poverty, their children, and future generations, are my greatest concern right now.
I promise you, once you read my memoir, you’ll never look at adoption in the same way again.

Adopt a village

I am a Laura Jean Thrall-Bland and I am Trace DeMeyer. Split feather – two names – two identities. Confusing, right?
Are any adoptees reading this? How about foster children? How about adoptive parents? Now what I can’t ask is – have any of you given a baby up for adoption? Why can’t I ask? Because there is a shame associated with this for many mothers and there is a stigma attached.
Thank God, little by little this stigma is changing, and views about adoptees who search for their relatives and open their adoptions is changing. Natural moms who want to find their lost child is changing.
What I learned about adoption and statistics in the past several years changed me.
What I discovered in reunion was not as pleasant as I wished, yet an increased awareness helped me write the book, heal my wounds, and transform fear into love.
The more I learned the better I healed.
As for the children who need families, please do not be afraid to become foster parents and legal guardians. Do not rob a child of their identity. Go to Social Services. I think rich celebrities need to adopt a village, not an individual child. If Madonna can afford it, she should sponsor an entire village in Africa and pay for their food and education, so she can end the cycle of poverty.
We can’t fix adoption until we fix poverty, and we know that won’t be easy. Like Gandhi said, poverty is the worse form of violence. Poor families, Indian people on reservations with stifling poverty, their children, and future generations, are my greatest concern right now.
I promise you, once you read my memoir, you’ll never look at adoption in the same way again.

Adopt a village

I am a Laura Jean Thrall-Bland and I am Trace DeMeyer. Split feather – two names – two identities. Confusing, right?
Are any adoptees reading this? How about foster children? How about adoptive parents? Now what I can’t ask is – have any of you given a baby up for adoption? Why can’t I ask? Because there is a shame associated with this for many mothers and there is a stigma attached.
Thank God, little by little this stigma is changing, and views about adoptees who search for their relatives and open their adoptions is changing. Natural moms who want to find their lost child is changing.
What I learned about adoption and statistics in the past several years changed me.
What I discovered in reunion was not as pleasant as I wished, yet an increased awareness helped me write the book, heal my wounds, and transform fear into love.
The more I learned the better I healed.
As for the children who need families, please do not be afraid to become foster parents and legal guardians. Do not rob a child of their identity. Go to Social Services. I think rich celebrities need to adopt a village, not an individual child. If Madonna can afford it, she should sponsor an entire village in Africa and pay for their food and education, so she can end the cycle of poverty.
We can’t fix adoption until we fix poverty, and we know that won’t be easy. Like Gandhi said, poverty is the worse form of violence. Poor families, Indian people on reservations with stifling poverty, their children, and future generations, are my greatest concern right now.
I promise you, once you read my memoir, you’ll never look at adoption in the same way again.

Adopt a village

I am a Laura Jean Thrall-Bland and I am Trace DeMeyer. Split feather – two names – two identities. Confusing, right?
Are any adoptees reading this? How about foster children? How about adoptive parents? Now what I can’t ask is – have any of you given a baby up for adoption? Why can’t I ask? Because there is a shame associated with this for many mothers and there is a stigma attached.
Thank God, little by little this stigma is changing, and views about adoptees who search for their relatives and open their adoptions is changing. Natural moms who want to find their lost child is changing.
What I learned about adoption and statistics in the past several years changed me.
What I discovered in reunion was not as pleasant as I wished, yet an increased awareness helped me write the book, heal my wounds, and transform fear into love.
The more I learned the better I healed.
As for the children who need families, please do not be afraid to become foster parents and legal guardians. Do not rob a child of their identity. Go to Social Services. I think rich celebrities need to adopt a village, not an individual child. If Madonna can afford it, she should sponsor an entire village in Africa and pay for their food and education, so she can end the cycle of poverty.
We can’t fix adoption until we fix poverty, and we know that won’t be easy. Like Gandhi said, poverty is the worse form of violence. Poor families, Indian people on reservations with stifling poverty, their children, and future generations, are my greatest concern right now.
I promise you, once you read my memoir, you’ll never look at adoption in the same way again.

Adopt a village

I am a Laura Jean Thrall-Bland and I am Trace DeMeyer. Split feather – two names – two identities. Confusing, right?
Are any adoptees reading this? How about foster children? How about adoptive parents? Now what I can’t ask is – have any of you given a baby up for adoption? Why can’t I ask? Because there is a shame associated with this for many mothers and there is a stigma attached.
Thank God, little by little this stigma is changing, and views about adoptees who search for their relatives and open their adoptions is changing. Natural moms who want to find their lost child is changing.
What I learned about adoption and statistics in the past several years changed me.
What I discovered in reunion was not as pleasant as I wished, yet an increased awareness helped me write the book, heal my wounds, and transform fear into love.
The more I learned the better I healed.
As for the children who need families, please do not be afraid to become foster parents and legal guardians. Do not rob a child of their identity. Go to Social Services. I think rich celebrities need to adopt a village, not an individual child. If Madonna can afford it, she should sponsor an entire village in Africa and pay for their food and education, so she can end the cycle of poverty.
We can’t fix adoption until we fix poverty, and we know that won’t be easy. Like Gandhi said, poverty is the worse form of violence. Poor families, Indian people on reservations with stifling poverty, their children, and future generations, are my greatest concern right now.
I promise you, once you read my memoir, you’ll never look at adoption in the same way again.

Monday, August 2, 2010

The takeaway: Adoptees fight for birth certificates





The takeaway: Adoptees fight for birth certificates



The takeaway: Adoptees fight for birth certificates



The takeaway: Adoptees fight for birth certificates



The takeaway: Adoptees fight for birth certificates



The takeaway: Adoptees fight for birth certificates



CLICK OLDER POSTS (above) to see more news

CLICK OLDER POSTS  (above) to see more news

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reblog from 2013 By Trace A. DeMeyer  Hentz I’ve been reading blogs by Christian folks who saved an orphan and plan to do it again.   Appar...

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To Veronica Brown

Veronica, we adult adoptees are thinking of you today and every day. We will be here when you need us. Your journey in the adopted life has begun, nothing can revoke that now, the damage cannot be undone. Be courageous, you have what no adoptee before you has had; a strong group of adult adoptees who know your story, who are behind you and will always be so.

OUR HISTORY

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BOOK 5: Lost Children of the Indian Adoption Projects